Banks are Wasters !

[HOS]

Setting up my new Limited Company and business the last few weeks.

Got my new company registered with Companies House, got a new accountant and talked to a "SENIOR BUSINESS MANAGER" from my local bank branch, same branch as my personal account.
Talked to this "SENIOR BUSINESS MANAGER" 5 weeks ago. Spent 3 hours with him showing him my business plan and talking commercial stuff , like you do. He had a very clear understanding what I wanted from him and the bank. To borrow funding to set up my business in the form of a new company account with a small overdraft facility to cover my set up costs. Piece of piss yeah ? Kiddie stuff ? Easy stuff ? Not high tech mutli million pound investment shit ya know ?
So we`re cool [8D] Looking positive [8D]

What could have been done inside 2 weeks has done zippo.

The "SENIOR BUSINESS MANAGER" went on holiday for ten days and never told me, the second week after we met.
After repeated phone calls from me I had to go and collect some forms he wanted me to sign in the branch. Forms all there ready for me to sign..... no they were`nt and no one knew about them either.
Signed them eventually, sorted them and took them back..... heard nothing for another two weeks..... 5 weeks now since we met and I really impressed upon this "SENIOR BUSINESS MANAGER" the urgency of my desire to set up this business fast.
So he called me late this afternoon after I left him a voicemail early this morning becasue he didnt answer his phone...to tell me his boss couldnt agree to the overdraft until I had set up my company and paid for my accreditation fees and paid for my licensed software etc. If I can give them receipts for payment of those things in a few weeks time, then they will consider an overdraft on my new business account.
Now I may be an older guy , but I do`nt have : "call me a total fuckwit" stencilled across my forehead.

So I had words with this "SENIOR BUSINESS MANAGER" about his job title and what the fuck it meant ??
I explained in a most profesional manner that after 5 weeks of being messed around I wasnt very happy and that if I wanted funding for the company set up costs, after I had paid them, then in real fancy technical financial terms, I wouldnt really need the fucking funding in the 1st fucking place.
Said "SENIOR BUSINESS MANAGER" is nothing more than a customer service clerk with no clout or say at all.

I can deal with just about most things in life.
But show me stupid and I`ll show you my other side.
I just do`nt do "STUPID".

Do you know why the banks are in trouble ? Because they are full of fucking stupid people who find it easy to lend billions to some nutball in some far flung war torn dictatorship than fund a new boom industry for a few pennies in the UK.

The economy is going down because of the banks rank stupidity.

[Fight_fan]

Feel better for the rant mate?

That really sux hey! Can u take ur business elsewhere to stick to em or is it not worth the trouble now?

[Docktor]

let me sort senior business manager out for ya
senior = old
business = none of your
manager = Im leavin early

Now ya know why nothin was done.

[zx12argh]

I used to work in the banks and if you knew half the shit that goes on with your money you'd crack the shits.

[Azrael]

Senior business managers come only second to telemarketers as the most hated cretinous pack of bottom feeding cunts known to man, and the more bad shit that happens to this scourge of soulless drones the better. What happens to small business when left in the hands of banks during a global economic downturn? Well judging from realistic simulations performed with a sledgehammer and a common laboratory frog we can assume it will be pretty bad.
The owner of the barge we have been working on for some months has run out of money having paid only a couple of thousand dollars of nay on 20k work of invoices he owes us. Why? Well aside from games of Monopoly earlier in life indicating him as a strong metaphor in life as a failed financial mastermind, some tight fisted reptile with some grasp of language trained to walk on its hind quarters at the bank is questioning his loan approval despite having several million dollar contracts spanning some 5 years.
Sure, the owner of said barge looks like a subscriber to “I’m a bit thick monthly” and despite being blessed with the integrity of a wet form guide, he has several multinational companies throwing contracts at him with immediate start dates irrespective of the current global shitfest.
So thanks now to the bank and barge owners fuckwittery not only are we going to miss this years AFR we are struggling not to lose our business and are off to Kambalda to make money to try and save our business.
Two other business are facing extinction due to this balls up..

End rant..

[Weaselman]

All i got to say is ive always hated banks.

I was in a credit union and when i joined the forces i switched to their credit union. No fucking way im ever changing

[HOS]

Likewise I hate the banks... parasitic lowlifes.

When you`ve been taken down hard a couple of times in your life and built your way back up, you learn about how low those banks are.
Nothing a wooden stake and a large mallet wouldnt sort out painfully :D

Mind you stupidity is endemic globally and throughout society, more so at the top of industry.

I never went to Uni in my life, so I havent got a degree.
Life went a bit shit shaped when I was 15 and as one of three bro`s, our Mum was diagnosed with cancer and took 3 long years to die very painfully when I had just turned 18. So thats why I never did the Uni thing, me and my older bro had to get our arses into gear fast !

I got by using my brains and what talent I had, didnt do bad for a working class lad. Never needed a degree, I just did the job anyway.

I`ve interviewed and sometimes employed kids with Ooniversity degrees written on soiled bog paper, they meant that much ;)
Some of these kids heads are full of self important shit, but do`nt know one end of a pencil from a scaffold tube. No idea how to WORK.
A Science degree and no brains ! Yup.[xx(]

Having an education or a degree doesnt necessarily mean they have any brain. I alwasy assume they do`nt until proven otherwise :)

Banks do`nt have the monopoly on being stupid though.

[StuNVA]

I couldnt get a bank to look at me when I was setting up, my major debtor spotted me 6 months worth of cash to get going. The business is good but the banks & credit unions will still only loan against security like my house, so the overdraft is personal, not what I wanted but it just goes to show they have no idea about anyone elses business but their own. I live in the bush and the quality of the "loans or business managers" out here is laughable unless you are a farmer looking for 5 million.

[Hagarr]

Fuck where do I start!

I have been a small business owner since '96 (30k turnover in '96 to 4.8m in '08)I have approached SBDC, have spoken to banks ("er sorry sir when you have turned over X?m come and see me!) have given banks information for credit cards to have them lose the information not once but THREE times, they also want security over my 600k property for a 50k overdraft??? How about I use a '38 snub instead of a Desert Eagle Mother Fucker??

Then you get a wanker of a client who say's FUCK YOU to a 170k invoice,so you try all avenues to get payment, so he still doesn't pay so you have D & B take out a court action against them they make a counterclaim now the claim I have made for non payments against my EX client is no longer the focus of attention as I now have to prove what this shitstick has claimed against us which is pure unadulterated hogswash bullshit with no documentation or proof of his claim.

I said to my lawyer the other day this won't happen again (he laughed) and said what do you mean I said once again this will never happen to me again as I will sort the problem myself with a Baseball bat and every time he recovers I will go around to his Sydney Mansion and break his Fucken knee caps and keep doing it.( He didn't laugh again I was very serious!)

Tom where's those Fucken Bricks :(

I seriously have to get off my soapbox and take a Valium. Any time ANY of you guy's wish to start a busines of any size please call me I'll give you ALL the information you need to not go through the crap that I've been through because there are some good people out there to help you but it takes a lifetime to find them and you basically need these people to advise you before you even consider starting a business.

End of very pissed and pissed off rant. Believe me I could go on as i'm sure the rest of you could as well.

[Azrael]

quote:Originally posted by Hagarr


Tom where's those Fucken Bricks :(



Im seriously considering starting a fresh business delivering bricks in exchange for monies owed. Im more than qualified and sure theres gotta be an honest'ahem' buck to be made in extracting funds from people otherwise unwilling to part with thier debts..

[WATEVR]

Hey Azreal you heading out my way, what you got to do at Kambalda shes all pretty quiet out there mate??

[Brodie]

My Mum was a bank manager for 12 years (Don;t anyone hit me!!!!) And i NEVER had any problems with the bank cause my mummy used to make sure everything was cool and sorted and fix everything...lol..such a baby I know...but it was GREAT...

Well what a fucken shock I got when she retired.......banks are nazi warmongering assholes!!! God since that day I have had nothing but trouble and shit and fees and the banks raping my bank account for whatever reason they want...........

Were all bent over a barrel cause in this day and age EVERYTHING you do , try to rent a house, try to get anything and its like WE WANT YOUR BANK STATEMENTS or fuck off!!

My problems have never been with huge amounts of money... but It pisses me off that I have had at least 5 loans from the national bank since i was 17 and EVERY time without fail they will NOT take the other loans into account or my payment history,, unless its to say "you missed a payment fuck off' Well what about the other 1000 payments I made on time??.......grrr

ooh this is a volatile subject brings up some hate within LMAO!!

[Azrael]

quote:Originally posted by WATEVR

Hey Azreal you heading out my way, what you got to do at Kambalda shes all pretty quiet out there mate??


Demolishing some concrete tank using ultra high pressure blasting. From what ive heard were cutting the launder off and exposing the rio rod for reconditioning but im not sure exactly, but at 720 a day to break shit its gonna be like a holiday for me..