PDA

View Full Version : Dumb Question



Fish
27-03-2008, 07:53 AM
I've got 2 dogs.

I bought a large bag of Meaty Bites at Big W and was standing in line at the check-out.

A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Meaty Bites Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time,but that I'd lost 25 kgs before I woke in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV's in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Meaty Bites and simply eat one or two every timeyou feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete soI was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her.

Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned by the food. I told her no, it was because I'd been sittingin the middle of the road licking my dick and a car hit me.

I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard as he staggered out the door.

Stupid bitch...why else would I buy dog food??

Bear
27-03-2008, 02:31 PM
Fck, that's funny! Top stuff. Did she ask for your phone number afterwards? :D

Jockney Rebel
27-03-2008, 03:48 PM
lmfao nice one your a honorary cockney mate ...we re known for sarky comments like that
like the one wher i fell over on a flight of stairs out side the court ...
a nice woman asked if i hurt myself
i said no it s ok i was just breakin a bar of chocolate in my back pocket

rod185651
27-03-2008, 05:46 PM
Mate that is Gold, thanks eh you just put a smile on my face after a fucked day.
cheers Rod

JackTar
27-03-2008, 06:11 PM
I have got a scar on the back of my head which I got late last year (you will all see it at the AFR as I did the stupid shave for a cure thing) I was sitting on a train and this chick behind me said ow that looks nasty how did you do that (was still pretty fresh then) I told her I got hit in the head by a Ninja star during a big fight in chinatown, she laughed and I told her it was no laughing matter it was a massive brawl many lives were lost I was lucky to get away with just a ninja star wound, she asked for my number.

Fish
28-03-2008, 06:48 AM
Sorry guys, as much as i'd love to take credit for that, it was actually an email i got send and thought i'd share.:( Wish I was quick enough to think of shit like that. oh well hope it brighted up your day though.:)

BANDITROD
02-04-2008, 10:01 AM
quote:Originally posted by JackTar

I have got a scar on the back of my head which I got late last year (you will all see it at the AFR as I did the stupid shave for a cure thing) I was sitting on a train and this chick behind me said ow that looks nasty how did you do that (was still pretty fresh then) I told her I got hit in the head by a Ninja star during a big fight in chinatown, she laughed and I told her it was no laughing matter it was a massive brawl many lives were lost I was lucky to get away with just a ninja star wound, she asked for my number.
i thought it was from getting your second head removed you crack me up cunt :D