Benz
19-03-2007, 10:38 AM
>> Dear IT Support:
>>
>> Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a
>> distinct slow down in the overall performance, particularly in the
>> Flower and Jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under
>> Boyfriend 5.0.
>>
>> In addition, Husband 1.0 un-installed many other valuable programs,
>> such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and then installed
>> undesirable programs such as: Football 5.0, Rugby 4.3 and Cricket 3.0.
>>
>> Conversation 8.0 no longer runs; it simply crashes the system. I've
>> tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, to no avail.
>> What can I do?
>>
>> Signed, Desperate
>>
>> __________________________________________________ ______________________________________
>>
>>
>>
>> Dear Desperate:
>>
>> First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while
>> Husband 1.0 is an Operating System.
>>
>> Try entering the command: C:/I-THOUGHT-YOU-LOVED-ME to download Tears
>> 6.2,
>> which should automatically install Guilt 3.0. If that application works
>> as
>> designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications
>> Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.
>>
>> But remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0
>> to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1.
>>
>> WARNING: Beer 6.1 is a very nasty program that will create Snoring
>> Loudly.
>>
>> CAUTION: Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law. This is not
>> a supported application and will crash Husband 1.0.
>>
>> In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have
>> limited
>> memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might
>> consider
>> buying additional software to improve memory and performance. I
>> personally would recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 7.7.
>>
>> Good Luck, IT Support ------------------
>>
>> __________________________________________________ _______________________________________
>>
>>
>> Dear IT Support,
>>
>> 18 months ago, I upgraded to Girlfriend 1.0 from Drinking Mates 4.2,
>> which I had used for years without any trouble. However, there are
>> apparently conflicts between these two products and the only
>> solution was to try and run Girlfriend 1.0 with the sound turned off.
>>
>> To make matters worse, Girlfriend 1.0 is incompatible with several
>> other applications, such as LadsNightOut 3.1, Football 4.5, and
>> Playboy 6.9. Successive versions of GirlFriend proved no better.
>>
>> I tried a shareware program, Slapper 2.1, but it had many bugs and
>> left a virus in my system, forcing me to shut down completely for
>> several weeks.
>>
>> Eventually, I tried to run GirlFriend 1.2 and Girlfriend 1.0 at the
>> same time, only to discover that when these two systems detected
>> each other they caused severe damage to my hardware.
>>
>> I eventually upgraded to Fiancée 1.0, only to discover that this
>> product soon had to be upgraded further to Wife 1.0. While Wife 1.0
>> tends to use up all my available resources, it does come bundled
>> with FreeSexPlus and Cleanhouse2005.
>>
>> Shortly after this upgrade, however, I found that Wife 1.0 could be
>> very unstable and costly to run. Any mistakes I made were
>> automatically stored in Wife 1.0's memory and could not be deleted.
>>
>> They then resurfaced months later when I had forgotten about them.
>>
>> Wife 1.0 also has an automatic Diary, Explorer and E-mail filter,
>> and can, without warning, launch TurboStrop and Multi-Whinge.
>> These latter products have no Help files, and I have to try to guess
>> what the problem is.
>>
>> Additional problems are that Wife 1.0 needs updating regularly,
>> requiring ShoeShop Browser for new attachments and Hairstyle
>> Express which needs to be reinstalled every other week. Also, when Wife
>> 1.0
>> attaches itself to my Audi TT Convertible hard drive, it often crashes.
>>
>> Wife 1.0 also comes with an irritating pop-up called MotherInLaw,
>> which can't be turned off.
>>
>> Recently I've been tempted to install Mistress 2005, but there could
>> be problems. A friend of mine has alerted me to the fact that if
>> Wife 1.0 detects Mistress 2005, it tends to delete all of your Money
>> before uninstalling itself'.
>>
>> Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a
>> distinct slow down in the overall performance, particularly in the
>> Flower and Jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under
>> Boyfriend 5.0.
>>
>> In addition, Husband 1.0 un-installed many other valuable programs,
>> such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and then installed
>> undesirable programs such as: Football 5.0, Rugby 4.3 and Cricket 3.0.
>>
>> Conversation 8.0 no longer runs; it simply crashes the system. I've
>> tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, to no avail.
>> What can I do?
>>
>> Signed, Desperate
>>
>> __________________________________________________ ______________________________________
>>
>>
>>
>> Dear Desperate:
>>
>> First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while
>> Husband 1.0 is an Operating System.
>>
>> Try entering the command: C:/I-THOUGHT-YOU-LOVED-ME to download Tears
>> 6.2,
>> which should automatically install Guilt 3.0. If that application works
>> as
>> designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications
>> Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.
>>
>> But remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0
>> to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1.
>>
>> WARNING: Beer 6.1 is a very nasty program that will create Snoring
>> Loudly.
>>
>> CAUTION: Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law. This is not
>> a supported application and will crash Husband 1.0.
>>
>> In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have
>> limited
>> memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might
>> consider
>> buying additional software to improve memory and performance. I
>> personally would recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 7.7.
>>
>> Good Luck, IT Support ------------------
>>
>> __________________________________________________ _______________________________________
>>
>>
>> Dear IT Support,
>>
>> 18 months ago, I upgraded to Girlfriend 1.0 from Drinking Mates 4.2,
>> which I had used for years without any trouble. However, there are
>> apparently conflicts between these two products and the only
>> solution was to try and run Girlfriend 1.0 with the sound turned off.
>>
>> To make matters worse, Girlfriend 1.0 is incompatible with several
>> other applications, such as LadsNightOut 3.1, Football 4.5, and
>> Playboy 6.9. Successive versions of GirlFriend proved no better.
>>
>> I tried a shareware program, Slapper 2.1, but it had many bugs and
>> left a virus in my system, forcing me to shut down completely for
>> several weeks.
>>
>> Eventually, I tried to run GirlFriend 1.2 and Girlfriend 1.0 at the
>> same time, only to discover that when these two systems detected
>> each other they caused severe damage to my hardware.
>>
>> I eventually upgraded to Fiancée 1.0, only to discover that this
>> product soon had to be upgraded further to Wife 1.0. While Wife 1.0
>> tends to use up all my available resources, it does come bundled
>> with FreeSexPlus and Cleanhouse2005.
>>
>> Shortly after this upgrade, however, I found that Wife 1.0 could be
>> very unstable and costly to run. Any mistakes I made were
>> automatically stored in Wife 1.0's memory and could not be deleted.
>>
>> They then resurfaced months later when I had forgotten about them.
>>
>> Wife 1.0 also has an automatic Diary, Explorer and E-mail filter,
>> and can, without warning, launch TurboStrop and Multi-Whinge.
>> These latter products have no Help files, and I have to try to guess
>> what the problem is.
>>
>> Additional problems are that Wife 1.0 needs updating regularly,
>> requiring ShoeShop Browser for new attachments and Hairstyle
>> Express which needs to be reinstalled every other week. Also, when Wife
>> 1.0
>> attaches itself to my Audi TT Convertible hard drive, it often crashes.
>>
>> Wife 1.0 also comes with an irritating pop-up called MotherInLaw,
>> which can't be turned off.
>>
>> Recently I've been tempted to install Mistress 2005, but there could
>> be problems. A friend of mine has alerted me to the fact that if
>> Wife 1.0 detects Mistress 2005, it tends to delete all of your Money
>> before uninstalling itself'.