Stupid Questions

[dazz]

recent stupid questions from customers

how much for a second hand little end bearing and what colours can you get?

will that CRF pipe make my YZ125 sound like a 4 stroke?

can you get glow plugs for bikes cause that would look trick at night.

how can it cost $1100 to fix, the bike was only $280 brand new.

CBR250's are faster than Blackbirds, you guys just don't know how to tune em

how much cheaper for cash with no trade

will a 9 volt battery and 2 AA's get me out of trouble for the weekend?

Can you order me a CBR600RR without the engine because I like the engine in my CX500 and would like to keep it.

My mate has a Honda GFX860 and I was wondering if you can still get the GFX485T with factory chain oiler? (he looked at me like I was the fuckwit)

Why don't they make a flyscreen visor for helmets?

if i don't want to use the o-rings in the chain can I get a refund if I bring em back?

can I get flame wheels for the Hyosung GV250 because I want to look like the Terminator.

I have noticed that pink and blue slips are cheaper than greenslips, what colour are the cheapest?

I took out the forks and turned em upside down but how do you make the bloody things fit in the clamps and who should i get to weld the caliper on?

Who has been riding my bike? when it came in it had 11200km on it and now it has 12100km on it? (bike had been at the shop for 1 hour)

There was a light on for about 35km and then it just stopped, it must be a warranty thing (bike was out of fuel)

If i buy a scooter now can I make it look like that later on (pointing at VT750)

Can i use these 7 credit cards to but that bike? (all different names)

I am sure you told me that the greenslip would cover the repairs to my bike.

I paid $11000 for the bike 2 years ago, put 2 lots of rego on it,2 tyres and a chain and sprockets, look I am a reasonable person, if you give me $13000 as a trade you have a deal

please add yours below

[Large]

:D There's nowt stupider than people

Some of those are absolute classics

Just what part of Aus are you in Dazz? I think I might avoid riding around there, any fuckwit thing could happen :D

[Gix11]

Are they for real? That's so fuckin' sad. How do you guys do it? I especially like the guy who thought you had done 900km on his bike in the last hour.

You've got to be happy with the idea that these people are allowed to vote, don't ya :D

No wonder the likes of Bob Brownholer get voted in.

[elle]

quote:Originally posted by dazz



if i don't want to use the o-rings in the chain can I get a refund if I bring em back?



oh please say you told him that you'd give him a refund :D

[dazz]

quote:Originally posted by Gix11

Are they for real? That's so fuckin' sad. How do you guys do it? I especially like the guy who thought you had done 900km on his bike in the last hour.

Kawasaki EL250:D

[dazz]

quote:Originally posted by chalk10

Just what part of Aus are you in Dazz? I think I might avoid riding around there, any fuckwit thing could happen :D


Shop is in Wyong area NSW, or Blacktown by the sea. If we get some more rain we will start to see gator chasin barges with Cesna engines on them in the main street.

This is Deliverence/Banjo country (cue dueling banjo music) and I am glad I commute to work.

[dazz]

[quote]Originally posted by dazz

recent stupid questions from customers


will a 9 volt battery and 2 AA's get me out of trouble for the weekend?

This guy was my personal favourite for a while, has a chinese 110cc quad and was going piggin up near Condobolin on a 36000acre property.
Needed a battery and we had none in stock.He did the calculations in his head and on 2 hands and looked down to his thong clad foot and worked out that 9+1.5+1.5 = 12. He had a plan to tape a square 9 volt battery to 2 AA's and assured me it would work. I was soooooo fucking shocked that such a thought was entertained that I agreed with him and proceeded to encourage him to give it a go.......fuckwit

[dazz]

Here is a fresh one from today:D

Can I put a front tyre on the back of my CRF450R cause the fronts last heaps longer than the rears

<center>FUCKWIT</center>

[red]

I liked the "CBR250's are faster than Blackbirds, you guys just don't know how to tune em" Thats fuckin gold!!

[WATEVR]

with this kind of stupidity i can start to see why some ppl in bike shops dont want to talk until they see cash.

[Large]

Honda owners seem to be overrepresented in that lot

[Cruisecontrol]

I had a bloke at work ask me where the radiator was on his bike because he had never checked the fluid level and thought he had better do it.

It was a CT110.

[ozkat]

I had a local Gold Coast Suzuki dealer(I was after a head gasket) tell me that i must have had my engine overbored to 1127cc because GSXRs only ever came out as 600/750/1100/1000

[devo]

Bwaahhhahaha now thats fucken gold wright there Oz

[zx12argh]

do you guys keep spaying equipment in your shops - cause you should do the gene pool a favour...

[gibbo]

Good on ya Dazz, remember the customer is always right, just make em sign something first;)

[pt]

quote:Originally posted by Gix11

Are they for real? That's so fuckin' sad. How do you guys do it? I especially like the guy who thought you had done 900km on his bike in the last hour.


just cause he's number dyslexic[xx(]

[Jockney Rebel]

oh dazz u poor bastard ...ill have to come up and ask u for a rad for me 900 now and insist it was built with one..
funniest one i ever heard was a newbie courier came in the drivers room [he had an old GP125 suzy] said he thinks his valves clearances needed checkin [hed read it somewhere!!!] my mate splat said hed do it for him for a tenner ..got up went over to him and put his ear to his chest and said "sound alright to me mate!" and he insisted his bike was a 500[the gearbox capacity on the casing, even although it said 125 in 20mm numbers on his side panels]
i feel for you mate coz u cant even escape from behind that desk at least yer oppos can hide round the back and piss themselves..

[dazz]

So next time you go into a bikeshop and get the trade standard blank expression from someone behind the spares counter pause for a second and think back to this thread. You may be following one of these cock heads from shop to shop.

[dazz]

quote:Originally posted by pt


quote:Originally posted by Gix11

Are they for real? That's so fuckin' sad. How do you guys do it? I especially like the guy who thought you had done 900km on his bike in the last hour.


just cause he's number dyslexic[xx(]


dyslexia is no excuse for the 50 minute arguement that followed. there was threats of A Current Affair and Dept of Consumer Affairs etc.The dickhead went off on a Jerry Springer Ranting session that any 400lb black woman would be proud of.

:)Right:)for the time i spent dealing with HD customers i have not the time nor the composure[}:)]these however take some beating(i wish i had:()
G`day mate!!! my mate at the pub fixed my front wheel on my TTR250[:o)]now it just shakes when i ride it[:X]can you tell me how to tighten the spokes up[?]
Sure;)see that lite bulb hanging from the ceiling[?]same theory MATE,next is a sale of a bike.
Afta this tool "shopped" me for 3 days[|)]he ask`s mate wots ya best price on a 954cbr[?]$17200.00 or;)
But bikebiz will do one for[:o)]$17400.00 or
I immediatly told him to fuck off[:X]

[dazz]

Syney City just quoted a guy $14300 for a Transalp with accessories which works out to be cost. I quoted $700 more than thier price(after hearing thier price because I am in this for the money:D and I cant stand this prick:D).

He said "yeah it's only $700 more and it would cost me that much to get to sydney and back anyway" 100km round trip.

[Jockney Rebel]

his name aint homer is it ? wouldnt he be riding the bike back?

[dazz]

quote:Originally posted by frankenbiker

his name aint homer is it ? wouldnt he be riding the bike back?


don't try to justify these people FB, just give a blank stare and nod your head.

[Jockney Rebel]

tru tru,im lucky in my business most [not all ]have an idea what the score is ..but i did get a guy ask me if he could bring his b double round to my house to save him money on the call out ???!!!

[loosebruce]

Hey Dazz, my Honda manual says I can get bigend bearings in pink,yellow,green and brown.Doesn't say anything about little ones though.
Dealing with the public sucks dunnit? There's probably a worse tool factor in bike shops too.
we get a few on learners courses. Once they are made aware that if booted from the course,for being a dickhead they've done their dough, the majority tend to pull their head in.
Classes tend to go smoother if you do bin one.

[BOHEMION]

Not bike related

Just had a Customer come in all in a panic

Bloke rekons someone has broken into his house and installed a key logger virus. He shows me this black cable hanging out the back which he has never seen before and starts telling me how the Police are investigating tomorrow, who did it.

I look at the cable

" ahhh mate do you own a Kodak digital camera? Cause the cable says Kodak on it...."

All i get is a blank look. Then starts rambling on about people who are after his data. Should have told him to wear a foil covered helmet so they can't scan his brain waves.

[Jockney Rebel]

lol..

[BOHEMION]

HE CAME BACK!!!! this time he enquired about Eye scanning technology to his house. I couldnt help myself and told him that if the crims are keen they will take ya eye out and scan it through. He walked out the door going " right right right right" Skitzo

[zx12argh]

Jeez... should told him about the new biometric rectum scanners and sold him a butt plug with a power cord attached...

[Jockney Rebel]

kin hell paranoid ...

[stevie]

Once had a customer ask for "Minth" brake discs...