Joke

[Rich]

Two aboriginal kids were arrested, one for drinking battery acid and the other for eating dynamite........

One was charged and........

other was let off :D

Ok it was funny after shit load of bourbon

Cheers Rich

[ozkat]

HAHAHAHA i thought it was funny. but then i would , wouldnt i?

[ozkat]

HAHAHAHA i thought it was funny. but then i would , wouldnt i?

[Rich]

For a native Australian it is indeed a talent to laugh at yourself Ozkat....

Don't forget the family secret.... oh yeah hows that 3% house loan going?

Cheers Rich

[Rich]

For a native Australian it is indeed a talent to laugh at yourself Ozkat....

Don't forget the family secret.... oh yeah hows that 3% house loan going?

Cheers Rich

i got another 1. "how do ya make an Orange cum??? lick its citerus"[:p][:p][:p][:0]. thick ear from the Mrs every time i bring that 1 out at a party.

i got another 1. "how do ya make an Orange cum??? lick its citerus"[:p][:p][:p][:0]. thick ear from the Mrs every time i bring that 1 out at a party.

[J7-11]

OK since we're on the topic of bad semi-racist jokes (and apologies if I offend anyone...)

What's red and looks good on aborigines?











Fire...

[J7-11]

OK since we're on the topic of bad semi-racist jokes (and apologies if I offend anyone...)

What's red and looks good on aborigines?











Fire...

[BOHEMION]

Got given a good one today hehe



A man was ordered by his doctor to lose 75 pounds due to very serious health risks.

As he wondered how in the heck he would ever do it, he ran across an ad in the newspaper for a GUARANTEED WEIGHT LOSS PROGRAM. "Guaranteed, Yeah right!" he thought to himself. But desperate, he calls them up and subscribes to the 3-day/10 pound weight loss program.

The next day there's a knock at his door, and when he answers, there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old young lady dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign round her neck.

She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company. The sign reads, "If you can catch me, you can have me!" Without a second thought he takes off after her. A few miles later, huffing and puffing, he finally catches her and has his way with her.

After they are through and she leaves, he thinks to himself, "I like the way this company does business!"

The same girl shows up for the next two days and the same thing happens.

On the fourth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10 pounds as promised.

He calls the company and orders their 5-day/20 pound program.

The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning, beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life, wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, "If you catch me, you can have me."

He's out the door and after her like a shot. This girl is in excellent shape and it takes him a while to catch her, but when he does, it is worth every cramp and wheeze. For the next four days, the same routine happens. Much to his delight, on the fifth day, he weighs himself and found he has lost another 20 lbs. as promised. He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/50 pound program.

"Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone. "This is our most rigorous program." "Absolutely," he replies, "I haven't felt this good in years".

The next day there's a knock at the door and when he opens it he finds a muscular guy standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads: "If I catch you, you're mine."

[BOHEMION]

Got given a good one today hehe



A man was ordered by his doctor to lose 75 pounds due to very serious health risks.

As he wondered how in the heck he would ever do it, he ran across an ad in the newspaper for a GUARANTEED WEIGHT LOSS PROGRAM. "Guaranteed, Yeah right!" he thought to himself. But desperate, he calls them up and subscribes to the 3-day/10 pound weight loss program.

The next day there's a knock at his door, and when he answers, there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old young lady dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign round her neck.

She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company. The sign reads, "If you can catch me, you can have me!" Without a second thought he takes off after her. A few miles later, huffing and puffing, he finally catches her and has his way with her.

After they are through and she leaves, he thinks to himself, "I like the way this company does business!"

The same girl shows up for the next two days and the same thing happens.

On the fourth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10 pounds as promised.

He calls the company and orders their 5-day/20 pound program.

The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning, beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life, wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, "If you catch me, you can have me."

He's out the door and after her like a shot. This girl is in excellent shape and it takes him a while to catch her, but when he does, it is worth every cramp and wheeze. For the next four days, the same routine happens. Much to his delight, on the fifth day, he weighs himself and found he has lost another 20 lbs. as promised. He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/50 pound program.

"Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone. "This is our most rigorous program." "Absolutely," he replies, "I haven't felt this good in years".

The next day there's a knock at the door and when he opens it he finds a muscular guy standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads: "If I catch you, you're mine."

[Gix11]

Ha ha. Saw that one coming but it was good.......

[Gix11]

Ha ha. Saw that one coming but it was good.......

[Tone]

A young country bloke moves to the city and gets a flat near the beach.He's terrified of going outside after hearing about all the trouble in the smoke so he stays home for a few days but then ventures downstairs to put his name on his letterbox.
As he's doing this the lift doors open behind him and a blonde beach girl walks out wearing absolutely bugger all.She starts putting the chat on him while he's standing there dumbfounded.

"Look",she says,"I can hear someone coming,lets go up to my place".
Country agrees and they go up a couple of floors to her flat.She opens the door,lets him in then shuts the door behind her and drops the very little she's wearing to the ground.
"Tell me",she says,"What do you think is my best feature?"
Country is staring at her and finally stutters out "Ya ya ya ears!"
She looks a bit pissed off and says to him, "My ears...look at this long blonde hair,these beautiful tits,these long tanned legs that go all the way up and make a fantastic ass out of themselves.Why would you say my ears?
Country looks at her and says "Well,when we were downstairs and you said you heard somebody coming....


....that was me!"

[Tone]

A young country bloke moves to the city and gets a flat near the beach.He's terrified of going outside after hearing about all the trouble in the smoke so he stays home for a few days but then ventures downstairs to put his name on his letterbox.
As he's doing this the lift doors open behind him and a blonde beach girl walks out wearing absolutely bugger all.She starts putting the chat on him while he's standing there dumbfounded.

"Look",she says,"I can hear someone coming,lets go up to my place".
Country agrees and they go up a couple of floors to her flat.She opens the door,lets him in then shuts the door behind her and drops the very little she's wearing to the ground.
"Tell me",she says,"What do you think is my best feature?"
Country is staring at her and finally stutters out "Ya ya ya ears!"
She looks a bit pissed off and says to him, "My ears...look at this long blonde hair,these beautiful tits,these long tanned legs that go all the way up and make a fantastic ass out of themselves.Why would you say my ears?
Country looks at her and says "Well,when we were downstairs and you said you heard somebody coming....


....that was me!"