oranges and lemons ........

[Jockney Rebel]

Amongst the biking cognoscenti there is a well used term to describe less than satisfactory examples of our chosen form of transport .These are known as Lemons
I have heard other descriptions of these unfortunate machines but we’ll keep it clean.

To qualify as a lemon a bike has to be, through design or lack of it, unable to perform adequately amongst its peers .Or be aimed at a faction of the market that just doesn’t exist or indeed be just an unreliable piece of crap.

Throughout the last 3 or 4 decades there has been plenty of these and in this column well be looking at some of the worst ones.

Now before I go any further and incur the wrath of the combined membership of the “I own one of those bikes and it’s alright “owners club .this is my opinion that just happens to be shared with a fair few others with more years experience than me.

I reckon there will be a few bikes that will surprise you in the list and maybe a few that you would consider to be worthwhile owning ?

Well that’s a personal decision and as long as you know the pitfalls and limitation s of your choice I say more power to yer arm and good luck .After all yours truly has spent too much time and money on a few of them myself ….some manufacturers whole product list falls into this category but to be fair most of those are designed for the territory in which their built… I cite Voskhod as one, great in Russia as a cheap get arounds but as far as exporting them to the West they’d have been kinder if they’d sent us a ballistic missile.
Fantic an Italian manufacturer that’s given us some great little 2 strokes but to unload the awful Fantic chopper on an unsuspecting public ?? An 8foot chop powered by your grannies lawnmower motor !
The worst thing about it was you couldn’t even outrun the people throwing things at you…..and believe me they would !

Its said that you get what you pay for and in the history of motorcycling cheap doesn’t always mean good value.
Come in CZ your time is up, some where back in the dark recess’s of time these bikes were modern…. yup that’d be about 1933 and its not because their from behind the iron curtain !! Because in contrast MZ managed to chuck out some fine bikes maybe not stylish but good performers in their own right

The Japs don’t get off lightly either …..
Honda’s CB500T with its one down five up and over the handlebars gearbox [it had a habit of seizing]and had naff styling. I mean, brown is for living rooms !.
Yamaha’s ill fated over complicated XS500 how can they market such a bike alongside a legend like the XS650 is beyond me ..
Kawasaki s horrific Z750 twin like the Honda mentioned before but even worse its almost like the two factories designers are one and the same bloke ..
Oh yeah and then there’s Suzuki…. hard to find lemons from their factory but releasing a rotary bike that’s heavier, more expensive and performs worse that its nearest stable mate in almost every area is some feat …
Enter the Brits, pioneers of so many motorcycling innovations yet doomed to failure because of short-sighted management and lack of development .I cite the deplorable build quality of anything British during the 70’s and the last minute dropping of BSA/Triumphs wonderful little 350ohc twins in 1970
And of course not forgetting good old Harley Davidson .. In my humble opinion the Americans backed the wrong horse on that one,my father had an Indian and there’s no comparison in my books.
The whole point here is that every one of these companies have given us some amazing machines but every now and then a true lemon slips through and that’s what well be uncovering.. stand by to be informed.

[Gix11]

Are these articles that have been published or ones you have lying around?

[Jockney Rebel]

all of these are published but i own the copyright

[Jockney Rebel]

Born To Be Mild




Normally the mere mention of a 70s 750 Kawasaki conjures up images of blistering acceleration followed by enough smoke to scare you into thinking the gates of hell have been left open …if hell is watching repeats of Neighbours till your suicidal then this bike spewed forth from there .

A little harsh ? Maybe,unfortunately this particular Kwaker couldnt scare yer grandma .I am of course refering to the mid seventies Z750 twin [KZ750 stateside].
Way back in 1975 someone had a few too many Sakis at lunchtime and went back to work with the idea of making a parallel twin somewhat akin to a Brit 750 ..
Ok so lets make the comparison the Triumph Bonneville T140 of 1976 a 360 degree twin had about 55 nags at its disposal ,handled fairly well and was reasonably light albeit with slightly questionable build quality and “prince of darkness” electrics

Bring on the Z750....”Wait” I can almost here you saying “ theres nothing really wrong with it” and you'd be right except for one major failing. It was out of step with the buying publics desires of the time and the reason I chose the Triumph as a comparison was simply to illustrate that .
The big Trumpy s design was about 30yrs old by then and granted the Japs had ,time and again, took British designs and bettered them, this one just came too late for the Akashi factory .So what is it that makes the Triumph sought after and the Kawasaki largely ignored ? Is it that elusive ingredient called character maybe ? I don't know.. its hard to quantify

These two bikes are almost identical in performance with the big Kawasaki being a little more refined .and a lot heavier .The point is that had the Zed been introduced say 7yrs earlier it would have made sense but not when the market was full of multi cylindered bikes and a glut of first time owners , the bike simply missed the boat and subsequently sales were mediocre. It does however hold the the honour of being the first Kawasaki to offer a rear disc brake so thats something i guess.
In all honesty tho if the H2 750 was the dangerous,promiscuous blonde then the Zed was her mate with the 'nice personality'. It just doesnt have that certain something that makes you lust after say ..,,an XS650 for instance.

As a buying choice these days ? Hard to say, there were not that many around new so they'd be rare, that dosent automatically make them worth anything though. The bikes ok , fairly reliable but has sedate handling and high mileage will have adverse effects on the 2 balance shafts,styling is typical of the time .
In my opinion the bikes wheel base is too long and at 230kgs[506lbs] far too heavy [the T140 weighing in at 197kgs].I guess if you find one in good nick it would make a decent enough commuter ,although there are better more suited alternatives. Touring? Again I dont doubt it would perform adequately as long as youve got plenty of time and smooth roads.
And this is the problem it doesnt excell at anything ...its just adequate. Tested up against its peers of the time ,Yamahas XS650,and Triumphs T140V,this becomes apparent the mere fact that these were the only two to compare speaks volumes about where the market was at the time......Anyway remember ride it hard long and often and take the bike out occasionally too !!!

Next time we ll be looking at how a huge multi national can screw up forced induction...its the 80s and turbos were the bomb ..some literally …. stay tuned