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Gix11
23-02-2006, 11:31 AM
While I was driving down the coast the other day, (going a little faster than I should have been)I passed under a bridge only to see a copper on the other side with a radar gun laying in wait. The copper pulled me over, walked up to the car, and with that classic patronising smirk asked: "Runway too short?" To which I replied: "I'm late for work." To which he asked: "What do you do?" I responded: "I'm a rectum stretcher" The copper was surprised and confused : "A rectum stretcher, and just what does a rectum stretcher do?" "Well," I said, "I start by inserting one finger, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in, work side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch the hole, until it's about 6 feet." Then the copper asked questioningly and cautiously: "And just what do you do with a six-foot arsehole?" To which I politely replied : "You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge .."

Speeding ticket: $200.00

Penalty Points : 3

Court costs: $100

Look on copper's face: Priceless.

Razorback
23-02-2006, 11:54 AM
Ill visit you in Jail I promise :)

dRRew
24-02-2006, 01:09 AM
gold.

03gixxerpilot
24-02-2006, 12:23 PM
Old, but still brings a smirk to my face.

speeddemon
26-02-2006, 03:42 PM
lucky he didnt want to stretch your rectum then...

special-k
27-02-2006, 01:51 AM
http://members.iinet.net.au/~macromrt/speed/1_tank.jpg

http://members.iinet.net.au/~macromrt/speed/1_bikestack.jpg

cjburns esq
01-03-2006, 02:51 PM
Special K where did you get the pic of the SLAV? A mate of mine would kill for that

BOHEMION
01-03-2006, 04:26 PM
The Picci with the SLAV was caught in Townsville, Know that road really well.

special-k
03-03-2006, 04:31 AM
Just found it while looking at some speed camera info site...

chadams
09-03-2006, 10:19 PM
http://members.iinet.net.au/~macromrt/speed/great_ticket.jpg

Rich
10-03-2006, 07:47 PM
Read the joke several times Si, but I still don't get it.....

Never mind this should make it my 100th post. Whew.... and a lot of quality Rye Whisky along the way too.

Cheers Rich

Gix11
10-03-2006, 08:10 PM
Ah, yea, sorry mate. I keep forgettin'. You don't have to do that shite do ya?

11-03-2006, 01:03 PM
quote:Originally posted by Rich

Read the joke several times Si, but I still don't get it.....

Never mind this should make it my 100th post. Whew.... and a lot of quality Rye Whisky along the way too.

Cheers Rich


My my, what a surprise[:0]

A cop without a sense of humour :D